Disagreements among friends or people are a constant thing. It should even be expected, especially if you want to preserve relationships. Although the goal is to find someone you are compatible with, there is no such thing as perfect compatibility.
Happy people have found a way to address incompatibility and disagreements. For a relationship, whether personal or professional, to be successful, the people involved must find a healthy way of dealing with their differences.
The modern idea is that if you encounter bad times in a relationship, you have to leave. People tend to forget that relationships are all about compromise.
There will be good and bad times. There will be obstacles, conflicts, and strong disagreements; the trick is to work on these issues together.
If you love someone and value their company, you’ll be willing to put in the work and work through the bad times because there will certainly be bad times. The question is, how do you handle these bad times?
Relationships are not a jolly ride. It’s a union of two individuals from contrasting backgrounds who come together for companionship and love.
So, there are bound to be disagreements on myriad issues until they understand themselves better. Even then, there would be contrasting opinions about several issues.
Even twins who share the same womb and similar backgrounds have disagreements now and then, not to talk about two considerably different individuals.
Relationships can survive despite all disagreements if the people involved are willing to define civil discourse and resolve their disagreements using civil discourse rules.
Also, relationships survive because the individuals involved are ready to compromise, take responsibility for their actions, and reassure their partners that they love them.
An effective method of neutralizing bad blood between people is by using positive language.
Yes, relationships flourish when people can communicate sincerely and tackle the subject of disagreement rather than themselves.
When you attack your partner instead of the issue at hand, chances are that your partner will retort, and the disagreement will turn into a shouting match. This doesn’t resolve issues, and it will create resentment.
However, there are strategies people can use to sustain their relationship, no matter the level of disagreement and the extent of variance in opinion.
Disagreements are a constant part of human interaction and should not cause problems if properly handled.
Here are ways to handle contrasting opinions in your relationship and improve it.
Ways to Handle Disagreements
Listen to Understand
Misunderstandings usually cause disagreements. Often, one partner will be so focused on being heard that they forget to listen to the other person.
However, suppose they approach the discourse with sincerity and willingness to understand the other person’s perspectives. In that case, they’ll have a more enriching conversation.
Understanding the other person’s viewpoint doesn’t mean agreeing with them. It means that you’re willing to hear them out. This requires you to be a good listener.
You can’t hope to understand if you don’t listen actively to what your partner is saying.
Agree to Disagree
In a conversation, each individual has their own opinion and view. Many disagreements arise from one person wanting the other to agree with them. People’s feelings about issues differ
. On some issues, one may feel strongly about it. In contrast, one might be undecided on another issue but leaning towards a certain path.
In conversations involving topics that your partner feels strongly about, it helps if you look for common ground.
Although it may sound nice, it’s not compulsory for you and your partner to agree on everything.
Disagreement also occurs in a relationship due to someone triggering the other person. The topic your partner feels strongly about may be connected to a harmful event in their past.
As much as it is their job to find a way past their triggers, it is only human to be empathic to their plight, even as they try to ease into the new situation.
Each person must take responsibility for their feelings. This will help partners not to trade accusations, excuses, and blames during a disagreement.
Reassure Them of Your Commitment
Disagreements are often emotional and can be pretty intense. It is too common for one partner to threaten to leave or sabotage the relationship.
Other times, one party may feel like the other may leave if they state their opinion.
The way to resolve this is to assure your partner that you’re committed to the relationship. It also works if you imbibe positive language and encourage sincere opinions to be shared.
Disagreements are inevitable in relationships, whether they are personal or professional. The goal is to manage the disagreements better, so they do not result in more serious quarrels.
The techniques above are useful if you intend to put in the work in your relationship and resolve the disagreement with your partner regardless of how big the difference in opinion is.